Even if you have read all the other books, taken all the courses, attended
all the seminars, self help groups and counseling sessions, read this book. A
grounded understanding of how we got to be the way were are is the path to
happiness, or, at least, gracious acceptance of the of the peculiar ways of
relationships. I and Thou focuses on self-identity and the interface between one
individual and others. Humans are social animals and generally depend on each
other to provide context and meaning. The strongest drive is to have a deep bond
with one person, the soul mate, lover and custodian.
The notion of a self alone is popular but individuality is more of an illusion than a fact. A sense of a
common or shared consciousness pervades individual consciousness. Each human is
born with a deeply imbedded sense of social involvement. Each human will bond to
parents, siblings and a few other individuals. Each human will seek affiliation
with other humans and will select a few among many to be intimates and close
associates. Each human will exploit, avoid or reject others who are not close
Human tendencies were not invented by society and are not going to change
until the construction of the human brain changes. The mind of each human is
mapped into the minds of other humans and the dominant experiences of each human
are observing others, desiring the company of others, working with others,
playing with others, feeling others, talking to others, thinking about others,
dreaming about others, strategizing about others, conflicting with others,
loving and hating others, making love to others, missing others when they are
Each human discovers who she or he is in an ongoing series of revelations.
Humans often have the illusion of inventing themselves from nothing. They often
claim to be the authors of their own destiny, but they are passengers in an
ancient vehicle on a journey that they have difficulty comprehending. As humans
journey through life, they continue to discover who they are and what it means.
If they have choices in the direction of their journey, reasonable decisions are
achieved by diligent effort, learning and practice. The process of individuation
depends on the opportunities provided by the local environment and by practicing
innate abilities and following innate tendencies.
Humans interact continuously and although they may not agree with one
another, still seek and require consensus about what is real and true.
"Thinking" is largely talking, a social activity. Isolated individuals will talk
to themselves and will tend to lose track of what is important and real without
interactions with others.
Hear Overview of Human Bonding
The book, I and Thou, focuses on intimate relationships. Innate tendencies are hard at
work when people meet, become lovers and end with arguments and fighting. The
same tendencies determine how family members interact and explain why so many
families are “dysfunctional.” When lovers form an enduring pair bond, they often
become parents and everything changes. Humans seek bonding with others and are
distressed when they become isolated. Humans bond to each other in several ways.
The most enduring bonds are kin-related, based on closely shared genes. The
deepest bonding occurs when mother and infant are together continuously from
birth and mother breast-feeds the infant. Bonds among family members are the
most enduring. Bonds to friends, lovers and spouses are the next most
significant. Bonds to colleagues, neighbors and even strangers that are admired
from a distance are next. Friendships are often temporary bonds, based on the
need to affiliate with others for protection, social status, feeding, sex and
I and Thou eBook
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The author is
Stephen Gislason MD
The Psychology & Philosophy series was developed by Persona Digital Books.
The books are copyright and all rights to reproduction by any means are
reserved. The author is Stephen Gislason and the publisher is Persona Digital Books